I'd like to share the wonderful of God's grace, goodness and love showered on me during the darkest moment of my life.  

I decided to take my catechism class to get ready for my baptism last Jan. Just before last easter, I experienced the darkest moment in my live. Marriage was in a mess, work was not on the right track, colleagues were giving me hell.  I was so stress out, felt no one cared about me that included my husband, my parents, my siblings and my friends.  I almost broke down, I lost hope and in total emptiness. 

However, God is good to me.  He sent me some godly and lovely people from church.  They supported me and shared with me verses from the Bible.  Encourage me not to stop praying and attend masses or any church activities, continue to connect with God despite the agony.  He sent a young and enthusatic couple to minister me.  The husband, named Nick, who is a newly baptised catholic.  His wife, Sharon, a very nice and supportive God-ma of mine.  Nick is very wise and well-versed in the Bible knowledge, always "throw" me many Bible verses and quotes for reflections.  He guided me along the way while I mulled over them almost everyday.  Whereas Sharon, as my God-ma, she showed her kind support and gave sound advices to direct me to the right path.  Not forgetting, my sponsor, Celestine, who showered me with her motherly love, cried together with me while hearing me out.

On the other hand, a special friend, my buddy, came into my life to show me the wonderous of God's creations.  He shared pictures of the majestic mountains, serene streams, beautiful sunsets and sunrises.  He was with me during the darkest moment.  He helped me to regained my confident and started to see hope. 

During mid-may I decided to take a 3-week vacation to break away from my relationship and work problems.  Trust me it was a good break, to be with God.  I believe if one is lost and empty, one should take a break, need the space to think and reflect.  Being in Turkey and Greece was wonderful.  As I mentioned in my previous blog.  I saw God's goodness not only in the nature but also the people in Turkey.  

When I was in Cappadokia, four of us were lost in the valley for 2 hours.  Beginning of the journey I prayed not knowing that we would be lost because we had a map with us.  However, it was a test of my faith.  We lost our way despite my early warning, the map didn't help us much.  Being a paranoid, I used to be afraid of darkness and worried about small things.  But that day I was calm and trusted in God that would help us to get out of the valley.   We back-trekked and found a family, farmers lived in the valley.  Not many Turkish could speak English, however, to our surprise this family spoke fluent English and directed us out of the valley.  You never could imagine the joy of getting out of there.  When we finally made our way up to the top of the valley.  It was a beautiful sights, the mountains, the trees and colourful flowers, the bright glazing sun shining over us and the land.  Far away we could see one of the majestic and icy-mountain.  Just like heaven.

The great experience in Turkey and incidents changed my prospective towards life. The Turkish help me to see that I should practice the "US, WE then I" way of living.  No more doing things just for MYSELF but have to consider about others. 

I know God always love me even though I have done many things wrong.  As long as I repent and mend my ways, change my characters to be more Christ-like, I will have be blessed.  The sufferings are my blessings as they enable me to be a better person, to be obedient, righteous and kind to my neighbours (means anyone other than myself).  I am blessed because though I am not baptised the Holy Spirit is willing to guide and help me to discern the right and wrong. 

Relationship with my husband is getting better after sharing my problems with him.  Telling him how I felt.  Although still struggle with my work, my colleagues changed their attitude towards me, they become helpful, concern and caring.  My parents and sibilings are more understanding and shower me with love and care because I start sharing my problems with them.  I will continue to change myself to grow spiritually, to live hard and well, to be good, to serve the church and the community. 

Life is just like my first 8.4KM city run, to raise fund for kids from poor homes.  In the beginning of the run, I was so enthusatic and ran with hope.  However, in the middle of the journey I was tired, I wanted to stop running and continue to walk instead.  But I persevered as I aimed to complete the journey by running not walking.  So I started to run with slower pace. 

Later I thought I was lost because I couldn't see my colleauges.  I decided to ask the marshalls who suppose to direct us the way.  One said: "you are on the right track, just keep moving ahead."  I was relieved and I moved on with a faster pace. 

After another few kilos, I doubted again because I was running round and round the business district, seeing the same buildings and bridges though knowing that I should be completing two loops at one area.   Again, I slow down and asked another Marshall.  He assured me that I was on the right way.  Along the way, tourists and other people stood along the road, clapping their hands, cheering for us.  Their cheers gave me encourage to run faster.  Finally I heard someone said, "keep running you will be reaching less than 200m."  Phew, that gave me more energy to move on faster inspite of the tiredness and ache on my feet and legs.

At the finishing point, I was so joyful.  I can't express that feeling in words.  I completed my first 8.4KM, hearing the cheers from my colleagues "Stacy, you made it!" 

Well, this run is not only a challenge for myself, I am happy that I could help to raise some money for the poor kids.

I hereby would like to say a BIG thank you to my church friends, my buddy, Pinak Vaghela and Sovan Bandyopadhyay for being here with me during my darkest moment, chatting and emailing me to give the guidance and kind support.

PRAYERS for my friends....................................................................................

Sharon and Nick:  To be loving and continue to serve the church with their kind souls.
Celestine: To be blessed with abundant of joy and health.
Pinak: To be more confident, stay loving.  Peace and joy be with you.
Sovan: To have a happy family and stay healthy.
My Buddy: To have a lovely, sweet and understanding wife. 

...................................................................I pray in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

I may have all the faith needed to move mountains but if I have no love.  I am nothing. I may have give away everything I have and even give up my body to be burned but if I have no love this does me no good. 
Love is patient and kind.
Love is eternal. 
Meanwhile these three remain: faith, hope and love; and the greatest of these is love.
-- 1 Corinthians 13

GOD bless you and your family. May grace of the Lord be with us always!